US Hawks Hang Gliding Association

An old geezer became very bored in retirement and decided to open a medical clinic. He put a sign up outside that said: "Dr.Geezer's clinic. Get your treatment for $500, if not cured, get back $1,000."

Doctor "Young" who was positive that this old geezer didn't know beans about medicine, thought this would be a great opportunity to get $1,000. So he went to Dr.Geezer's clinic.

Dr. Young: "Dr.Geezer, I have lost all taste in my mouth. Can you please help me ??"

Dr.Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in Dr. Young's mouth."

Dr. "Young: Aaagh !! -- "This is Gasoline!"

Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your taste back.That will be $500."

Dr. Young gets annoyed and goes back after a couple of days figuring to recover his money.

Dr. Young: "I have lost my memory, I cannot remember anything."

Dr. Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in the patient's mouth."

Dr. Young: "Oh, no you don't, -- that is Gasoline!"

Dr.Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your memory back. That will be $500."

Dr. Young (after having lost $1000) leaves angrily and comes back after several more days.

Dr.Young: "My eyesight has become weak --- I can hardly see anything!!!!

Dr. Geezer: "Well, I don't have any medicine for that so, here's your $1000 back." (giving him a $10 bill)

Dr. Young: "But this is only $10! "

Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You got your vision back! That will be $500."

Moral of story -- Just because you're "Young" doesn't mean that you can outsmart an "old Geezer"*

Remember: Don't make old people mad. We don't like being old in the first place, so it doesn't take much to tick us off.

Dr. Geezer's Clinic - ENJOY YOUR DAY !!

If God wanted us to vote, he would have given us candidates.
                                                                ~Jay Leno~

The problem with political jokes is they get elected.
                                                                ~Henry Cate, VII~

We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office.
                                                                ~Aesop~

If we got one-tenth of what was promised to us in these State of the Union speeches, there wouldn't be any inducement to go to heaven.
                                                                ~Will Rogers~

Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where there is no river.
                                                                ~Nikita Khrushchev~

When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I'm beginning to believe it.
                                                                ~Clarence Darrow~

Politicians are people who, when they see light at the end of the tunnel, go out and buy some more tunnel.
                                                                ~John Quinton~

Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you.
                                                                ~Author unknown~

Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from the other.
                                                                ~Oscar Ameringer~

I offer my opponents a bargain: if they will stop telling lies about us, I will stop telling the truth about them.
                                                                ~Adlai Stevenson, 1952~

A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country.
                                                                ~ Tex Guinan~

I have come to the conclusion that politics is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians.
                                                                ~Charles de Gaulle~

Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks.
                                                                ~Doug Larson~

There ought to be one day -- just one -- when there is open season on Congressmen.
                                                                ~Will Rogers~

Just because you don’t take an interest in politics, doesn’t mean that politics won’t take an interest in you.
                                                                ~Pericles~

Trey Gowdy, South Carolina Congressman, recently responded to a reporter about the military in response to a question from a CNN reporter about the DoD ban of transgenders from joining the U.S. armed forces. As Trey typically does so very well, he nailed it rather succinctly.

Question: How can President Trump claim to represent all U.S. citizens, regardless of sexual orientation, when he banned transgenders from joining the military? Isn't that discrimination?

Trey Gowdy's Response:

"Nobody has a right to serve in the Military. Nobody! What makes you people think the Military is an equal opportunity employer? It is very far from it - and for good reasons - let me cite a few."

"The Military uses prejudice regularly and consistently to deny citizens from joining for being too old or too young, too fat or too skinny, too tall or too short. Citizens are denied for having flat feet, or for missing or additional fingers."

He went on to explain:

"By the way, poor eyesight will disqualify you, as well as bad teeth. Malnourished? Drug addiction? Bad back? Criminal history? Low IQ? Anxiety? Phobias? Hearing damage? Six arms? Hear voices in your head? Self-identification as a Unicorn? Need a special access ramp for your wheelchair?

"Can't run the required course in the required time? Can't do the required number of push-ups? Not really a morning person? and refuse to get out of bed before noon? All can be legitimate reasons for denial"

"The Military has one job: Winning War. Anything else is a distraction and a liability. Did someone just scream? That isn't Fair? War is VERY unfair, there are no exceptions made for being special or challenged or socially wonderful."

"YOU must change yourself to meet Military standards and not the other way around. I say again: You don't change the Military - you must change yourself. The Military is not about being fair, it is about taking advantage of others and about winning."

"The Military doesn't need to accommodate anyone with special issues. The Military needs to win wars and keep our Country safe - PERIOD!"

"If any of your personal issues are a liability that detract from readiness or lethality...thank you for applying and good luck in future endeavors."

"Any other questions?"