[Rick Masters]

April 29, 2016

A taxidermist and his apprentice pull an Ozone Warbler from its perch.
"It snapped at me!" complains the apprentice.
"I told you, grab it by it's ankle," replied the taxidermist. "That seems to calm them."
"I can't wait to stuff it!" says the apprentice. "Then we'll see how calm it is!"

[Rick Masters]

April 27, 2016

After a trek through the forest, taxidermists spot the nest of an Ozone Warbler high in the branches of a chestnut tree.
"They are attracted to these trees because of the nuts," said one taxidermist.


Sure enough, as the taxidermists climbed the chestnut, they spotted an Ozone Warbler holding his nuts and screeching, "Hallop! Hallop!"
"We think they are calling out to attract a mate," said one taxidermist.
"Having a perch in a chestnut with freshly cracked nuts would seem an ideal situation for the creatures. It almost makes me sad that we stuffed it."
Unfortunately, no egg was found.

[Rick Masters]

April 29, 2016

Taxidermists arrive at an Ozone Warbler nesting site.

The Ozone Warbler is found and retrieved for stuffing.

A taxidermist checks the nest for an egg.
Unfortunately, no egg was found.
"This is really a drag," said the taxidermist, dejectedly. "Without an egg, we risk losing the sponsorship of a nearby Korean restaurant."

[Rick Masters]

April 30, 2016

A taxidermist cautiously lowers an Ozone Warbler to the ground.
"It was pretty calm at first," said the taxidermist. "But then it started pecking the back of my head. That pissed me off."
That was the moment he decided to stuff it.

[Rick Masters]

April 29, 2016

Exhausted taxidermists ascend a tree to capture a nesting Ozone Warbler.
Unfortunately, no egg was found.
"After we stuff this thing, we're going to drink a case of beer," said a taxidermist, tiredly. "This was our third one today!"

"All I can think of is a cold beer," complained the taxidermist, worn out by the long day of work. "This Ozone Warbler crap is getting out of hand!"
"Nah," replied the other. "It's mating season. It happens every year. All they can think of is dropping into a nest and cracking their nuts."

[Rick Masters]

May 4, 2016

Deep in the forest, hikers encounter the nest of an Ozone Warbler.
"Mommy!" exclaims a child, "what's that sound?"
Ringing through the forest canopy echo cries of "Hallop! Hallop!"
"That's a very strange bird," says the mother. "Johnny! Don't stand under it! It might go doo-doo!"

[Rick Masters]

April 22, 2016

"Hallop! Hallop!" cries the lonely Ozone Warbler, safe in its high nest, hoping to attract a mate.
"It will be nesting season, soon," says a knowledgeable taxidermist. "The trees will be full of them."

[Rick Masters]

May 4, 2016

An Ozone Warbler, snapping and clucking, is slowly lowered from its nest by cooks from a nearby Korean restaurant.

[Rick Masters]

May 6, 2016

An Ozone Warbler hangs contentedly in its nest.
Occasionally the forest canopy rings with the plaintive mating call of "Hallop! Hallop!"
It scans the horizon hopefully.
Soon, the chance for a mate!
Then an egg!
Unfortunately, the only ones attracted are a taxidermist and three cooks from a nearby Korean restaurant.


Stealthily, the four approach from below and, using snares mounted on poles, seize the unsuspecting avian by its ankles.
Then, snapping and squawking, the protesting creature is pulled to the ground and plucked.


Good! Ozone Warbler - such a delicacy. Mmmmm. Yummm!
"It's the closest thing to flying that my stomach has ever found!"

[Rick Masters]

May 6, 2016

Taxidermists cautiously approach the strange intruder, driven north by El Nino.
"It threatens the nesting sites of the succulent Ozone Warbler!" complained a cook from a nearby Korean restaurant.